Message Board Mania
Posted January 28, 2007, 9:18 PM ET

I always kid people who waste time constantly posting on message boards, claiming that they don't have a life. Between my daily ritual of the TV commentary, multiple radio interviews, hosting a 4-hour daily show, sponsor obligations, JamPack responsibilities, answering hundreds of emails, and conducting business with Southern Fried Football™ and my PrimeTime Radio Network duties (not to mention "PackSmack")...to say that I have a full plate would be an understatement.

But late last week, I got hooked on one of the great message board posts of all-time. In fact, it was the funniest topic that I've ever read on a message board. It all started with the controversial end of the Duke-Clemson basketball game...the bizarre climax of the thriller at raucous Cameron Indoor Stadium made for a legendary night on Tobacco Road and on the ubiquitous World Wide Web.

The creative minds of some Tar Heel fans didn't miss an opportunity to have some fun at the expense of the Duke-Clemson controversy. On the website www.insidecarolina.com, a thread was established that will go down in history as one of the most entertaining in recent memory. The title of the thread...."Things you can do in .6 seconds at Cameron Indoor Stadium".

I was made aware of the post during my "PrimeTime with the Packman" radio broadcast on Friday afternoon. As I stated earlier, I get about 300 emails per day, and I would say that after the Duke-Clemson game the night before, the number of emails for me was closer to 500 given the circumstances of the show topic. However, one of the emails was about the thread on www.insidecarolina.com ....I read the first couple of posts and I was hooked.

I enjoyed them so much that I began to read them on the air, and the next thing you know, people were emailing me from all over creation wanting to know the site. My co-hosts were roaring with approval, and we had a great time with the site and the clever posters. As of this posting on packsmack, there are 51 pages to the thread....you need to check them out for yourself.

I have read the list from start to finsih a couple of times and made a list of my Top 10 favorite posts....so I am going to list them in no particular order, and I would like to give a special thanks to insidecarolina.com for all of the laughs on their site last week.

Things you can do in .6 seconds in Cameron Indoor Stadium:

*  Make a complete list of all of Wilt Chamberlain's sexual partners.

*  Recite the meeting minutes from the Duke Football Summit..

*  Burn a grilled cheese sandwich until you get a likeness of the Virgin Mary on it.

*  Undermine the credibility of an entire sport.

*  Check out all of Duke's hot cheerleaders.....ever.

*  Explain algebra to Patrick Ewing.

*  Explain why 6 was afraid of 7 to Cozell McQueen.

*  Pay off the ref's American Express cards.

*  Sober up JJ after a night of sea breezes.

*  Watch Clemson win a basketball game in Chapel Hill.

Now that I have spent countless hours reading a message board post, I've got to get a life, and get back to work.

Somebody explain to me what the NFL is doing on gameday of the Super Bowl? Last week, the NFL stuffed shirts declared that tailgating was off-limits within a one-mile radius of Dolphins Stadium. The league would not allow coolers, grills, alcohol, bottles, or anything else that represents a good time. Anybody that doesn't comply will be escorted off the property. That's a great policy, since the face value of a ticket is $700 and a parking spot around the stadium can go for as much as $325 bucks. Nothing says "fun" like spending over $1,000 dollars to stand around in a parking lot before the game. It is an incredible act of arrogance by the NFL, but what else is new? Have you seen the rules Jerry Richardson has implemented at the Panthers' stadium?

NC State fans got upset, and rightfully so, when school officials decided to open the tailgate lots four hours prior to kick-off....Clemson fans are steaming since the school just announced that golf carts and over-sized tents were not allowed...and the Duke fan was upset that somebody is actually sitting in his section at Wallace Wade Outdoor Stadium.

Is there any doubt that the NFL will eventually charge the average fan to watch their championship game? In our lifetime, the Super Bowl will be a pay per view event. I've been to one Super Bowl game, and it was the most boring event that I've ever witnessed in person. It is so corporate that you really don't feel like you're at a sporting event. If somebody offered me tickets, I'd give them away....now, the Super Bowl parties during the week? That's a different story.

We had a chance to witness some incredible performances over the weekend. I'm hard pressed to pick the most impressive accomplishment.

The Australian Open gave us Serena Williams' return as a champion. She destroyed Maria Sharapova in straight sets. The next day, Roger Federer was unstoppable as he won his 10th Grand Slam title. For the record, Federer has won six of the last 7 Grand Slam titles, and he never lost a set in the Australian Open. The last time that happened in men's tennis was way back in 1980.

In college basketball, the UNC Tar Heels made a statement on the national scene by traveling to Arizona and pounding Lute Olson's club....by 28 points. It was Arizona's worst home loss since 1983. The fact that UNC took care of business without the use of Brandan Wright and Marcus Ginyard makes it even that much more impressive.

In the NBA, the Phoenix Suns won their 17th straight game...they still haven't lost in 2007. They are on a tear, winning 33 of their last 35 games. The only two games they lost in that stretch were by two points and one in OT. That's insane.

What else can you say about Tiger Woods? He rallied with a tidy 6-under par, 66 to win again on the PGA Tour. Going back to last July, Tiger has now won 7 consecutive PGA Tour events. The record is held by the legendary Byron Nelson, who won 11 straight (in the same year)....either way, Tiger Woods is simply incredible.

That's not a bad sports weekend, leading into the hype that is Super Bowl XLI.

If the Super Bowl is another blowout, I'm going to spend my time reading the message boards.