Whacking Tony Soprano
Posted June 10, 2007, 11:27 PM ET

I just finished watching the worst finale in television history, and I'm pissed. The HBO series "The Sopranos" peaked about 4 years ago, and it has slowly but surely sucked into mediocrity...kind of like my San Francisco Giants.

Since Tony Soprano wasn't taken out in the final episode, I've decided to take care of it myself. If any suit at HBO decides to bring the mob family back, I can assure you that I won't spend a single second watching or talking about it, much less devoting any time to the show or its characters....kind of like what I'm doing from this point forward with the pathetically lame NBA Finals.

Since nothing important or interesting happened in the Sopranos' finale....I've decided to give you a rundown of some folks who did get whacked over the weekend....this time, it involves sports.

Roger Federer was whacked....again....in the French Open by Rafael Nadal. The kid from Spain can sure play on the clay. Now let's see him do it on grass at Wimbledon.

The Cavs were whacked by the Spurs....again.....and Game 2 was as unwatchable as the last episode of you-know-what. I'd rather watch a WNBA regular season game in person than have to watch a replay of Game 2 of the NBA Finals. Let's face it, LeBronze has nothing around him...and watching Cleveland play meaningful basketball in June tells you how weak the Eastern Conference must really be. There is hope for the Bobcats.

Jab Zudah was whacked by Miguel Cotto.....seriously, he really was.

John Daly was whacked by his wife, Sherrie....seriously, he really was. There's nothing quite like waking up to a woman who attacks you with a kitchen knife. For the record, Daly made the cut....no pun intended.

Also in Memphis, Adam Scott was whacked by journeyman Woody Austin. For Austin, it was a brilliant final round 62 that did the trick....it was the lowest final round shot on the Tour this year.

The Palmetto state was whacked in the NCAA Super Regionals. Clemson complained all week about not hosting, and then proceeded to be swept away by the ring of aluminum bats and cowbells in Starkville. Their arch-rivals, the South Carolina Gamecocks, were beaten by "Carolina". The border war provided hilarious phone calls on my radio show, but the Gamecocks' relief pitching was worse than the conclusion of you-know-what.

The Yankees are hot. They have a 6-game winning streak heading into play this week, and they actually closed the Red Sox lead down to single digits. They whacked the Pirates....everybody whacks the Pirates.

Jeff Gordon won again....the race fans of Pocono were whacked by rain and a shortened race.

A filly whacked the field at the Belmont Stakes, winning the last leg of the Triple Crown...it was the first time that has happened since 1905.....1905? That was about the last time that show on HBO was entertaining.

It's a good thing that I don't run in the same circles as that Soprano guy...I'd really like to give him a piece of my mind. After all the years, all the hours of watching that show on HBO, I really feel cheated. Screw the mob....I'm an "Entourage" guy for life.