Sold Out Arena
Posted July 15, 2006, 8:36 AM ET

Bruce Arena is out as the coach of the U.S. soccer team. His contract will not be renewed at the end of the year.

Hmmm, what took so long to come to this conclusion? The USA's effort and result in the World Cup was weak at best. For crying out loud, we scored one goal (I'm not counting the gift from the Italians) and never won a single game.

Arena supposedly told close friends that he wanted to return, but the decision by the US Soccer Federation is the correct one. Arena and the USA Soccer program need a fresh start....and I have the man for the job.

Perhaps the quarter-final appearance in the 2002 World Cup set the bar and expectations too high for the program. But let's face it, the US of A is still light years away from truly competing with the world's best.

Arena did a nice job during his eight-year tenure which was highlighted by the '02 World Cup in addition to 71 victories. But you get the sense that Arena has maximized the program...it is time for a change.

And while the USA soccer officials look high and low for their next leader, I have the perfect guy for the job.....

No it's not Juergen Klinsmann, the former coach of Germany....No, it's not some of the other names that are being kicked around like "Mooch" Myernick or Dave Sarachan (by the way, I have no idea who these guys are....supposedly they are current coaches in the world of soccer).

After watching endless hours of the 2006 World Cup and seeing the style that is being played by the world's best players...a style that includes headbutts by the the great Zinedine Zidane from France, and incredible flops and dives by players on every team that qualified for the Cup....there is one man that incorporates and perfects all of the elements that I've mentioned.

His name is.....Vince McMahon of the WWE.

That's right, Vince McMahon is a guy that has mastered dives, flops and headbutts. How can you dispute his credentials? Plus, he is a marketing genius and heaven knows the USA soccer program could use some marketing skills and needs additional exposure.

Does Vince know anything about soccer? Who knows, but for argument's sake let's say he doesn't know squat about the game...what's the difference between that scenario and what Bruce Arena and Team USA proved in Germany during the World Cup?

I'll guarantee you that a Vince McMahon-led USA soccer team would be more entertaining on and off the pitch...can you imagine the storylines, the headbutts and other illegal moves that Vince can incorporate into the world's most boring game?

And if we don't score or win a single game in the 2010 World Cup under his leadership, how is that any different from what Arena produced in 2006? Plus, I'll guarantee you that the USA soccer team would be a lot more entertaining to watch....nobody can fake a blow like the WWE stars...and that includes all the panty-wastes that fall down at the drop of a hat in the soccer world.

Vince could have Nature Boy Ric Flair and HHH as his assistants and they can certainly take care of all the light work needed to be successful on the World stage.

Next time some soccer geek wants to pull a Zidane and headbutt somebody, you better think twice about pulling a gag like that on the new USA soccer team led by Vince McMahon...I wonder if a figure-four leg lock would warrant a red card?

FIFA better get ready for the ultimate sleeper hold.